Sunday, February 26, 2006

Just the other day

My parents, my brothers and I were In our rickety house. The zombies were closing in, and we had to deal with it. Everyone unanimously decided I would stay at home with mom, but I objected saying I should go with my dad instead of my eleven year old brother. No one seemed to agree with me and everyone went out hunting. Later my older brother Jacob come home and for some reason I was now supposed to go hunt zombies with him, so I went to the rack of melee weapons, up in the attic, and chose the best two cutlass swords I could find. The blades have more of a curve with a notch on the back, and I thought this would help snag the zombies head if need be. They only had a little rust, but seemed unstable in the blade. Duel blades, that is the way to go, I cross the blades and them together in a decapitation motion. "These will work just fine." Jake and I start heading to the main floor when a zombie lumbers out of the darkness, with a quick cross slash of the double blades, the zombie’s head rolls to the floor. It was no match for my oxidized cutlasses. We start walking down the stairs when a zombie seems to appear out of thin air from above, Jake takes it out with three quick slashes. One to the arm, the next to the chest and a final heave decapitates it. I think, “This is going pretty good.” Another zombies appears out of the darkness and flings itself at me, I stab at it finally decapitating its bloody bubbling head. Finally we make it to the main floor, and we leave to go hunting for more of these evil putrid vile zombies.
After hunting zombies for quite some time we return to our house. It is set in a small clearing surrounded by brush and trees, the lawn has been mowed naturally by animals of sorts. Approaching the house Jake and I see Bender defending the house he is shooting rockets swiftly at the impending attack of a large female lion, twice the size of a normal lion, this lion is not phased by benders on slot of rockets. Jake goes in to attack first, swing and taking a step back at the same time, it look like a dance, as they swing around jumping and swing at the same time. I start in on the fray of swinging my melee weapons. The battle raged on, until we took the Lioness down, hacking at its throat it fell with a thud.
Once the lioness was killed we headed back into the woods to take on more zombies. As we were walking through the forest we came to a group of zombies lumber in a small clearing, their feet tripping on the roots that looked like sea monsters protruding from the ground. The zombies stumbled towards us, their flesh was falling from their arms, eyes protruding from their sockets. Jake and I started in swinging. I was overly confident and jumped into the center of the fray . Surrounded by three zombies, one grabbed my arm and I felt like everything slowed as I saw it open its jaws and start towards my arm with its half missing teeth. The zombie was going for a bite. I quickly started hacking at its neck, was I too late? The teeth had hit my skin, but had it penetrated it? there was too much blood, I could tell if it had broken the skin or not, I was in a panic. Frantically I asked Jake what I could do. What he had to say wasn’t comforting. He said, “well, we can only wait to see what happens, and if you do start to turn we will have to decapitate you.” I reeled at the idea of loosing my head, and stammered a stream of words as if to save time by saying things faster, “couldn’t we just cut my arm off and than I would be fine?” thinking id much rather loose an arm than loose a head. There was nothing we could do but wait. “I guess you will have to watch me and not let me behind you,” I said. There wasn’t much we could do now, and I was wondering where my dad and little brother had gotten to, so me and Jake head deeper into the woods. We came to a three-way section in the road and turn off to the left. By this time the forest had been cleared out mostly other than the part of woods we were heading towards, The Blood Moore. I wanted to find my brother and father. The woods seemed to be sectioned off into small clearings lined up in a row. We passed three clearings when we finally came to the section that wasn’t cleared. There were three to five skeleton archers lined up across a small chasm. There was no way we could kill them with melee weapons. We were about to retreat when Jake saw an old friend of his. The man was in his seventies and didn’t look like he was in good shape. We grabbed him an ran, there were arrows flying everywhere around us. Finally we got into a safe clearance, but we had to bring the man back, he needed brain surgery. His brain was practically falling out of his head. We rushed him back to the cross section in the road, where a brain surgeon happened to be operation on my friend Todd, who had had previous brain operations, the surgeons assistant started right away to work on the old mans brain, pulling it out and starting to poke inside the man’s skull, when all of the sudden I WOKE UP!

Wednesday, February 22, 2006


I walk through the door, back from work.
I am hungry, i had the oppurtunity to go to taco bell, but the fact that i am broke strongly discouraged that.
I eat a stick of string cheese, but the hunger continues.
There is only one option to quench the hunger: The Hot Dog.
I get a hot dog out walk to the nearest microwave that doesnt have someone sleeping next to it.
At the furthest end of the hall i emerge with a fully "cooked" hot dog eager to add the condements of ketchup and mustard, dont forget the relish! gotta relish that stuff.
In my room i grab the hotdog buns, whats a hot dog without a bun? not a perfect hot dog thats what.
I set it down and tie the bag of buns back up.
What! whats this, a squished hot dog bun, with a funny black mark? NO! it cant be.. frantic i grab the back rip it open to reveal my worst nightmare.. MOLD!
I guess ill just through these away..
I start to crumple the hot dog buns up when out of no where a memory hits my brain with a small echoing noise.

(Tim: "You wanna step on this loaf of bread with me? I imagine it'd be quite fun."

Me: "DO I!"

So we did.)

squish+bread+feet+stump= FUN! YEAH!!!
I through the buns to the floor and begin to trample them gleefully.
better than any hot dog bun or hot dog, is the memory and once again the glee of soothing bread squishing between my toes.
Thanks Paul for a bread squishing fun time.

First Post on Blogger

Yeah, I might start using this.. since i think it looks cooler than most of the other blogs... I am at work right now.. and i probably should be working. so i will put a better message up later!